How to stop comparing yourself to others?
How to stop comparing yourself to others? — Break the habit of feeling insecure, envious, and discontented together with your life. Who does one most often compare you to?
If you’re unsure, do these questions: Who have you ever compared yourself to within the last 24 hours?
If you’re still unsure, consider the last time you checked your Facebook or Instagram feed. Which updates made you are feeling envious, or made you are feeling as if your life paled in comparison? Successively, did any posts cause you to feel smug, or better than that person?
Here are some tips:
1. Become conscious of, and avoid your triggers.
Start noticing the situations that cause you to play the comparison game. Social media, as I’ve mentioned, maybe a big one for many folks. What about other circumstances? Is there a particular one that is consistently bragging about this or that, or asks you questions on your life that are designed to form you are feeling inferior? Are there certain activities, like strolling through a high-end mall, or driving through an upscale neighborhood, that regularly causes you to feel discontented together with your life?
Make an inventory of whom and what you regularly envy or compare yourself to. Write how each negatively affects you, and why it’s actually a waste of some time. Resolve to catch yourself next time. Avoid comparison triggers if you’ll, especially if the activity or contact doesn’t add meaning or any real value to your life.
2. Remind yourself that other people’s “outsides” can’t be compared to your “insides”
This is such a helpful habit to cultivate. Unless you’re really on the brink of someone, you can’t use their outward appearance to gauge the truth of their life. People carefully curate the social media versions of their lives, and do an equivalent with the lives they live out publicly. You’ll have had the experience, as I have, of being shocked when a few that seemed to be happy and solid announced their divorce. Still wish others well, of course, but within the event that their life gives you a reason to feel bad about yours, remind yourself that you simply don’t actually know what goes on behind closed doors.
3. Repeat whenever necessary: “Money doesn’t buy happiness, and never will”
It’s well established that wealth, beyond having the fundamentals in life, isn’t related to increased happiness or well-being. I won’t to perform flamenco dance at an exclusive resort frequented by celebrities and therefore the mega-wealthy, and a manager there once told me that she’d never seen numerous unhappy people in her life. Money and things provide temporary boosts of joy; their inevitable inability to supply lasting sustenance is typically more disappointing than anything.
4. Be grateful for the great in your life, and resist any lies that shout “It’s not enough”
If you commit yourself to be deeply grateful for what’s good in your life and remind yourself of it daily, you’ll be far less susceptible to comparison and envy. If someone or something triggers that ugly feeling of negative comparison, stop and remind yourself of what’s good in your life, right now. There’s such a lot.
5. Use comparison as motivation to enhance what actually matters
This human propensity to require what others have is such a waste of your time unless what you see and “covet” in another are some things of deep worth, as their generosity or kindness. Who does one admire? What sorts of comparisons might actually be healthy for you? For instance, there are women I do know well who are extraordinarily kind and generous wives, mothers, and friends. They really make a difference in their worlds, and that I want to be more and more like them. Who inspires you to measure better, within the way that matters most? Spend your precious time and thoughts on this, instead.
Imagine if you’ll elevate the comparison game to a useful kind. Stop falling prey to its dark underbelly, which does little quite increase feelings of misery and lack in your life. Use comparison, instead, to become a far better person and perhaps even make your little corner of the planet a far better place.
